Spooky Spider – Just One of Those Days at the Lane House – Helena MT Photographer

Posted by in Life, Joy, Laughter

I’m one of those people who is not at all creeped out by spiders – so when I saw a giant one crawling across the floor today (“giant” as in looks-EXACTLY-the-same-size-as-the-plastic-spiders-people-put-in-the-cotton-batting-at-Halloween-time) I though “oh, what a perfect opportunity to show Claire that bugs are nothing to be afraid of!”

Because our child was somehow born with the I-AM-PETRIFIED-OF-ALL-BUGS gene…to the extreme bewilderment of her mommy & daddy.


Not a single person in her life (Mommy*, Daddy, Grandma, Grandpa, Grammie, Papa, aunties, uncles) shrieks at the sight of bugs.  Or even reacts really.  Not a single person.  But when our child was ~8 months old she noticed her first dead fly – and Scott and I thought she had torn off a limb.  For reals.  When we realized the source of the hysterics was a dead fly we were both…confused.

And though we have done our darndest to curb this fear – it persists.  Our child who would happily spend every waking moment outside.  Our child will touch dead deer eyeballs and dead elk tongues without a shudder (true story).  This same child is just downright terrified of bugs.  **confused face**

So back to the GIANT spider at our house today.  [yeah, this whole convoluted story started there:)]  So I see this ginormous  spider crawling across the dining room floor and I quickly scoop it up in a glass and then call Claire over so we can check out this “super cool!” spider together.  Which we do.  And then [for some reason] I think to myself “hmmmm,” and I check out the belly of this giant spider.

And I see the red hourglass shape as clear as day.


Hello giant black widow spider.

And then I think “weeeeeeeell, maybe the whole black-widow-spiders-are-SO-poisonous thing is one of those exaggerated urban myths,” so I Google it.  And I find the following: “The black widow spider has a potent neurotoxic venom and is considered the most venomous spider in North America. However, the female injects such a small dose of venom that it rarely causes death. Reports indicate human mortality at well less than 1% from black widow spider bites.http://ohioline.osu.edu/hyg-fact/2000/2061A.html


It “rarely causes DEATH.”  I feel so much better.  [NOT]

Now realizing my little “we don’t have to be afraid of bugs” activity has backfired somewhat I say to Claire “So honey, if you see a big spider like this you really shouldn’t touch it, ok?”

And she turns her big brown eyes to me and says with complete serious confidence, “See.  I told you Mommy.  We DO need to be afraid of bugs.”


Well, damn.  She kinda has me there.

So much for that perfect life lesson.

That’ll teach you Mommy.

Just kill the dang spider next time and keep the life-lesson to yourself:)





(*Full disclosure – my I’m-so-not-afraid-of-bugs attitude does not extend to grasshoppers.  Grasshoppers are an ENTIRELY different story as they are THE creepiest things on this planet.  **shudder**  But I never let my child see that.  I just silently shriek in my head and pray they don’t jump with their icky sticky crunchy legs on me – ohhhhhh ick ick ick ick ick ick!!!!!)



How bout you guys??  Any bug phobias out there?  Any I-am-the-perfect-Halloween-decoration-except-I’m-real-and-poisonous items show up at your house lately?  And anyone else with me on the grasshoppers thing??????? :-)



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